UFO-02 Detector
by Images SI Inc.
|
Our Price: $149.95 Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days Category: BISS See more product details |
|---|
Customers in the UK,
Buy this product at amazon.co.uk
for British Pounds
Digital Cameras Photo Reviews of UFO-02 Detector
Customer Review: The Greatest Threat to Mankind
Summary: 5 Stars
It appears as though most of the reviews for this item are intended to be funny. I guess it is human nature to make light of that which we do not understand or that which we fear. However, UFOs and the dangers they present are no laughing matter.
This is a serious device designed for a serious purpose. For some unknown reason, certain individuals are often targeted by alien beings on a repeated basis. Once you have been abducted, your chances for re-abduction increase significantly. Most of my clients are repeat abductees. One of my clients, who is only 33 years old, has been abducted 7 times in the past 4 years. They are crippled by their anxiety, wondering when the next attack will be, wondering when they aliens may decide to keep their unwilling subject for good.
Do you think my client is laughing about this device? No. This device is far beyond a mere novelty. It gives my client the peace of mind that nothing else could provide. When it detects the presence of a possible UFO, my client is given ample warning to hide where the aliens cannot find him.
You may laugh and buy this product as a joke, and I suppose that is all fine and good. But to those of you who have fallen victim to the aliens, I would like to reassure you that this product really does work. You can have your life back, and sleep soundly again, knowing that when you wake up, it will be in your own bed (or wherever you fell asleep last), and not on an examination table in an alien spacecraft.
Alien abduction is no laughing matter. Shame on those of you who would mock the victims of this cruel act. May you never NEED a device like this.
Customer Review: Does it work for all aliens or just those with carbon-based bodies?
Summary: 5 Stars
I was particularly alarmed to see that when I clicked on this item, four of the five recommended purchases were for, well, let's just say, internal, lower-body-cavity personal hygiene needs. I guess it's mighty hard to get things cleaned out after dealing with those aliens and their famous probes. Ick.
I've been considering marketing my own unique "let's-find-those-aliens" device, a metal colander with three rows of 27 plastic eyes glued around its perimeter. I've also found that welding a brass spigot on the very highest point of the colander helps amplifiy the signals. Bear in mind, this only works if the spigot is put in the "on" position.
For those in the know, this UFO detector really isn't needful. I mean, think about it. If you were an alien, if you had the advanced technology capable of traveling at the speed of light and you chose to visit earth for the purpose of watching little humans scurry about, wouldn't you also have the ability to HIDE from those little humans?
I'm not worried about the little alien with the green-glow and the oval-shaped eyes. I'm worried about the oak tree in the side yard that stares at me when I walk by. If you were an alien, what kind of tree woud *you* be?
Customer Review: I Told You!!!
Summary: 5 Stars
So. How do you like that?
I am so tired of the looks and stupid questions. "Gee Grandpa, did they anally probe you?" Sure, keep laughing. It's all fun and games until they show up at your house. Let me tell you something else, TIN FOIL DOES NOT WORK. I don't care what your reptilian friends told you. It does not affect the subtle cloaking radiation that makes him appear human.
Sorry, I got side tracked from the review.
This amazing device gives ample warning and is HIGHLY ACCURATE. I had a pretty good idea of when there was abnormal activity in my area. BUT NOW, DAMN. Every time that I notice distorted sensory emissions, bang, the detector is going off! WOOT WOOT WOOT!
Last Tuesday, it was raining and I admit that it is much more difficult for me to hone in on the parapsychotical wave lengths in precipitation. The detector starts going "WOOT WOOT WOOT!" I reach for my divining rod (don't laugh, Johnny Mnemonic says, "go low tech.") and my proton pack. Sure enough, one of those b*stards was right in my living room!
Every day, I am thankful to own this piece of technology. Get yours soon.
Customer Review: Works Like a Charm
Summary: 5 Stars
As a definite human, I would have to say that the UFO detector is a masterpiece. Just last month, old Bonnie Clyde went missing. Normally we consider this normal, as she has frequent trips out to old Mr. Jenkins' place. However this time I noticed that something was different. All the lights in her home were on and there was a giant hole in the ceiling right above that primitive device you...we call a television. Everyone in town was hysterical as to where she was, but I just grabbed my handy UFO detector (complete with built-in ashtray). That thing was buzzing louder than Mr. Crane's daughter rolling in the hay with that disgusting fleshpile of a boy. It was that instant that I knew a UFO was afoot.
I am very satisfied with this product and will recommend it to all of the human race. That way they will know when we...the aliens are attacking.
Customer Review: This device proved me right!!!
Summary: 5 Stars
I purchased my UFO-02 Detector to test a theory of mine. I have long believed Barack Obama is in fact, an alien. I can now, unabashedly confirm this is true. Everytime he appears on television speaking so eloquently from his teleprompter (and consequently, speaking like a slack-jawed idiot without his teleprompter) this device goes off without fail.
This is not surprising, the 01 model went off every time Bush butchered the English language whilst in office. I particularly like the fourth setting (a new addition to the 02 model) labelled "Corrupt Chicago Political Lie Detection."
You see? The aliens are getting smarter but Images SI Inc. is one-step ahead. Bravo brave company, bravo.
Also, I love the fact that I can mount this one my Klagzorthan Glorpklank Death Ray.
Thanks again Images SI inc.!